The Oldest Game: Ledah versus The Guardians

Day 139, 2009

Like so many other days in the realm, it was a calm, rather uneventful day. Zleiphneir meditated upon the wall, the silence only broken by bits of conversation betwixt him and Tree. Apparently, Tree said something funny, because Zleiph laughed; his laughter was joined by that of the puppet, which in turn, caused Zleiph to frown a most displeased kind of frown. “Only ONE Guardian?” Ledah cackled, “THE Guardian?” The narrow look upon Zleiph’s face was enough to silence the puppet, but only for a moment, and in that moment, ShadowSeeker passed by, observant as always. “Red oil? You’re going to paint yourself with that and pretend it’s blood?” Shadow asked curiously. “Mebbe…” a bit of a twisted grin spread across the puppet’s face. “nah... it’s to paint the Gazebo. The Gazebo of Chaos!” Zleiph shook his head and spouted off mockingly “if you can get color to stain this world, I’ll be amazed” With that said, Ledah promptly attempted to cover Tree with his oily red mess, but the color faded away almost instantly. Zleiph shook his head and sighed “Its just doesn’t stick” Ledah seemed confused “no, no.. I’m sure it’s there” He looked closely at Tree, but Zleiph retorted quickly “are you saying I’m color blind?” “Well... you’re an antelope… so Yes!” Ledah seemed quite pleased with his response, but Zleiph seemed unamused. He tilted his head at Ledah “I challenge you to a battle of the Oldest Game…” This confused, yet interested the puppet “The what?” “It is a battle of words and imagination…” Zleiph patiently explained the concept of the Oldest Game, a test of wits that Driftwood had brought with him to the realm, to the puppet while Artelan watched quietly.

A grin spread across Ledah’s face “I am Ledah, totally awesome and invincible!” Artelan quickly replied “I am death, inevitable to all… “ “ I am... a life support Machine!” “I am a power failure” Ledah looked disappointed for a moment, but lit up as he spoke again “I am a back up generator!” he said and then promptly began to make mechanical whirring and sputtering noises. “I am a malfunction” Zleiph laughed and relaxed against the wall, quite amused. “I am a highly trained coincidentally appearing expert on repairing things!” “I am the human error, always there waiting to strike” Ledah frowned. “I am owned” Artelan smiled. “I am next time, as you will try again another time.”

Zleiph seemed rather pleased “That was fun to watch, can I try you Ledah?” The puppet thought for a moment “Hmm… okay” “I am the preying mantis, hidden by environment, swift and striking” “I am human development, crushing your forests.” Zleiph’s expression turned blank as he tried to think of a counter for Ledah’s answer. Ledah grinned victoriously. Zleiph shrugged it off and leaned back against the wall “That was over rather quickly.” Seemingly very pleased with himself, the puppet wished to continue this “game” and turned to Artelan once again. “ I am an elephant on roller-skates, beat that!” he spouted off confidently. “I am a mouse on a bicycle coming up from behind” Zleiph laughed his head off at Artelan’s response, his actions only further spurring Ledah. “ I am a cat, eating you up!” “ I am a dog, chasing you to hell” “ I am a devil, poking you with my pitchfork!” Zleiph’s laughter continued to ring out. “I am Jesus, forgiver of sins, forgiving you.” I am God, disowning you as my son and robbing your powers from you!” “ I am the people of your faith leaving you” “I am Buddha, gladly welcoming you!” “I am death, welcoming you into the next life” “I am reborn, Death sucks!” Ledah spouted off with quite the bit of emotion. “I am sickness and weakness, and your life is a living hell.” “I am advancements in medical technology, banishing you from the world!” “I am multi-resistant strains of bacteria, ignoring your medicine” “I am researching medicines. Wait there... I am scared, please don’t infect me” Ledah pleaded. “I am old age and decay, you were too slow” “I am still Alive! Continuing the race!” “I am infertility, ending your race.” “ I am IVF! Saving us!” Zleiph rolled around on the ground, laughing hysterically “ …and I’m dying of laughter!” Ledah looked at him “I am Life, saving Zlei! Hurry!” “I am Armageddon, a meteor coming down on your planet” “I am the secret shields I didn’t tell you about, saving us.” Ledah grinned. “I am human error, a failing miscalculation in your shields.” Ledah swiftly raised one arm into the air “I am Superman! I will destroy the meteor! And here comes Wolverine!” “I am Magneto, controller of metal” Ledah zoomed around Tree “Superman! Go Go GO!!!” “I am kryptonite, your weakness.” Ledah stopped in his tracks, eyes wide. “Not Kryptonite, NO!!! I am Spock, and my crew from a time warp!” “I am the Borg fleet.” “I am refugees running for it” Ledah sprinted around again. “I am a refugee camp, full of refugees and sickness, awaiting a never ending war” “I am human emotion, pitying and helping each other” “ I am human greed and corruption, taking the help away.” “I am Satan, dragging sinners to hell” Zleiph scratched his head, and continued to watch. Artelan smiled a bit. “I am Atheism” Ledah looked at Arte and cried out “No! Not atheism! I am a Jehovah’s witness, knocking on your door So much, you convert, believe, and the world blows up!” Artelan grinned again. “I am scientology, richer than you… and we own Tom Cruise.” Ledah looked dumbstruck. “I surrender, I mean… come on, you have Tom Cruise…” Zleiph fell about laughing hysterically. Ledah shook his head “this is the day you converted me to a Bob Neutral.” Realizing what came out of his mouth, Ledah hurried away, hoping Zleiph had not heard it.

Arte turned to Zleiph “Were you paying attention?” Zleiph nodded with a wide grin, “Oh yes, I can dredge it back up if I need to.” Arte leaned back against the wall “so, what do you think?” Zleiph grinned and rubbed his chin absent-mindedly “I think it’s excellent… most excellent indeed..” Arte smiled and patted Zleiph on the shoulder “You weren’t that bad” Zleiph laughed “not that bad? I said but one sentence and was crushed like a small flea…. A bouncy flea, but still… a flea.” Arte quickly corrected him, slightly bemused “Two sentences” Zleiph laughed “the second being… That was quick?” They both laughed. And so ended another round of the Oldest Game.

Guardians of Tree 2; Ledah 1.