Oh yes, confessions stage, “alcohol” starting to fade maybe…
I have to say that I’ve sacrificed some of my initial concepts because of some players. In a bad way I mean. I was (and maybe still am) thinking that there should be a villain and a factor of controversy in any system in order to keep it dynamic and avoid a steady way to collapse. Normally I would have planned to do this in a different way, but some things led me to take personal decisions and mask them so that they will not be publicly admitted. Damn I should shut up, but this helps me organize my thoughts, so yes..I am using you as my personal psychiatrist lol.
Some of the villains around here made me put an invisible mark on them, and judge them and all the ones surrounding them. It’s not because of what happened, but that triggered it. I think that these negative factors shift the MagicDuel world in an unwanted direction. I could simply erase some of the ancient accounts that cause this, and count on the fact that they will simply give up. But I can’t do it, it’s far more interesting to see what destruction looks like and understand it, than to paranoidly avoid it and shut it down. These accounts made me “cheat” so to speak, not seriously, but I did sabotage some of them silently, and cut some of their connections to limit “the spreading of their evil” …I love when I sound like a mad inquisitor.
Because I had to do this, I have the feeling the games “stability by chaos” had to suffer a lot, and I started a hunt that will lead nowhere in the end. MP7, MP2, and factions are all things orientated to role-play and made so that they will “clean” the grinders of their dark desires to “beat the world”. MP7 is simply cancelling all current achievements, and if this sounds scary it still has some nice things to counter it.
I’d actually like more of the game to be unbalanced towards role-play than fighting, BUT I admit I should do this differently and be fair to everybody, including those that destroy the things I built. Cheating loyalty points to favour certain alliance members even if they did not know about it, or faking some head contest scores, are not things I am proud of, and NO they are not part of “ruling the realm”. They are just my reaction to an unstable system and to a constantly changing personal life. I guess it all started when in RL I realized that I can hate a very close friend as my biggest enemy, I think that’s then when I started to take subjective decisions and not think about the bigger plan in things. It all happened at Christmas/New Year, I realize that it’s wrong, but I don’t feel like stopping doing it. I learned not to post on the news log when I am angry, because that causes a mass reaction and everybody seems to be angry for whatever reason, I also learned not to make it public any more because that causes a wave of paranoia, like with the traps set for cheaters….but I am still learning. All my life I have been learning, every second of it, I can’t say there is one single thing that I know all about.